Okay, so maybe that's not exactly true. She's done lots. Like gain prolly twenty lbs. (pronounced 'libs') since the last post. And spend tons of time with her nearly-identical twin sister Harriet. And get offers from random crazies on the street to "trade your mp3s for my mp3s." And go swimming in the creek and in the ocean.
On that last item, here she is at Niki's parents' farm in eastern Oregon (for the record, I fuly realize that pictures of me in my undies is the reddest of red meat for those wretched parasites over at Dog Blog Watch, but whatev -- their reign of terror has gone on long enough).
This was pretty muchly Audrey's first time swimming, by the way. She was super tentative, but she did get herself all the way in the water, so Niki and I were sufficiently proud. Nearly-identical twin sister Harriet wasn't as interested in the physical sense -- she chose a more intellectual approach to the water -- and we were just as proud of her:
That was maybe like a month or so ago. Audrey was still already looking pretty big, though:
But so anyway, just yesterday (no time delay!) at a beach right off Ruston Way in Tacoma, Audrey repeatedly bounded bodily into the ocean after the sticks we threw for her to fetch. It was pure joy incarnate:
Nearly-identical twin sister Harriet took a less intellectual approach to the water this time and occupied herself by licking sand. Hey, each of us brings a little something different to the table in making up this happy family:
Much time was spent on the deck, where it quickly became the Niki and Audrey Show...
...with me as mere interloper:
As evening approached, I was curious to see how Audrey -- not the bravest of soliders -- would handle the rockets' red glare/bombs bursting in air, etc. While she's a red-blooded, dyed-in-the-wool patriot, don't get me wrong even for a second, she did kinda beat a swift retreat to the safe enveloping confines of Tim's lap and arms. 
And then later, she and Julius just flat-out gave up. Does anything say surrender more clearly than this little bit of haplessness?
Audrey, whom I also occasionally love, has recently taken an interest in many of my favorite books as well:
While it may seem from the picture above that she's developed a particular taste for Faulker and Salinger, let me assure you that the gremlin is a literary omnivore. So, I hatched a plan. I set out a decoy that she could easily reach...
in the hopes of avoid another repeat performance of this:
And, it worked!
The cold cold water may have been a little traumatic for her, but since I've already included pictures of her getting a bath 
Pretty soon, she got all emo on me. Trust me, she can compete with the most pathetic of them. To wit -- Audrey from the Diva Gremlin blog:
Pete Wentz from Fallout Boy:
Once on board the boat, she was still feeling a little sheepish.
But we gave her a talking-to...
...which seemed to reassure her. 
I think we made Captain Mike Sheafe proud...
...and we felt a little victorious ourselves. I mean, we did just conquer the sea, after all.
In the end, we needed to reflect on what it all means:
Thanks again to our great friend Anne for taking these pictures and documenting the fun for us! Despite taking most of the pictures featured on the Diva Gremlin blog, Anne has yet to appear in one -- a situation which will have to be remedied soon...
But Audrey was more interested in wrestling with her buddy 
They are ferocious, and there was much gnashing of teeth.
